When it comes to personality, the adage “more (sometimes less) than meets the eye” is apt.

Have you ever asked yourself the rhetorical question, “Who am I?” Ever ponder the real personality behind the face that stares back at you when you look at a reflective surface? Was there an instance when you were confronted with a situation that led to this self-interrogation? Has there been a point in your life (or are you even there right now?) when you wondered what am I made of? What defines me? I can only imagine the innumerable times this question has emanated during sessions from those reclining on therapists’ couches.

I bet most people (if not everyone) at one time or the other in their lives have pondered this question, musing at the very essence of their being. A point comes or a situation (even series of situations) presents itself in everyone’s life that leads such an individual to contemplate this short and innocuous-seeming question, the answer to which we quickly discover may indeed be complex – that is if the individual is able to arrive at an answer.  This write-up seeks to set those who are currently unsure on the right track, assist those on the path of self-discovery to crystallize their thoughts, and finally give those who have already taken this journey, a yardstick/basis for validation or possibly, re-evaluation.

Whom You are Not

According to Maya Angelou “You can’t really know where you are going until you know where you have been.” So, before we delve into trying to unravel who you are, let’s deal with who you are not because contrary to a lot of insinuations and popular beliefs, an individual is not defined stricto sensu (Latin meaning “in the strict sense”) by any of the following:

  1. You are not your occupation: Don’t get me wrong, if you studied and are licensed as a surgeon, you remain a medical doctor. However, this is not all that you are. While someone’s occupation can influence the person’s behavior, ideologies and thought process, who a person is goes way beyond what that person does for a living. It goes without saying that many people are engaged in the vocation they are currently into mainly to enable them pay their bills. If at the moment you are in a role that is looked down on, don’t let it get to you; do not look down on yourself. Life is said to be in phases.
  1. You are not your race: No one in the world had a say in what race one was born into, neither can infants determine the colour of their skin. That said, no race is superior to another even though some people are welded to the notion that the opposite is the case. Everyone irrespective of the person’s race is either as great or insignificant as that particular person believes her/him-self to be. Your assessment of self should not be limited by your race or colour.
  1. You are not the religion you inherited: Since this is the underlying core of what gives credence to who we are (more on this later), the religion you profess does not wholly define you especially if it was inherited. Most people adopted the religion they were born into or the religion predominant in the region of their sojourn. That said, it’s one thing to “belong” to a religious group, its’s another thing to live by the tenets.
  1. You are not your past: Some find it uncontrivable that they are not solely determined by their past actions (or in some cases, inaction). While it is true that every individual’s past contains markers of that person’s makeup, humans are fully capable and can change as this is intrinsically wired into us makeup. Myriad people have proven that anyone can make a U-turn and choose a positive path different from that trodden in yesteryears. Most if not all of these dramatic/ striking transformations happened after an event significant to the individual(s) in question. The occurrence then caused such people to either define or redefine purpose, answering the question (s) such as “Why am I here (on earth)” or “How do I become a better person”?
  1. You are not what society says you are: It is my firm belief that the opinion of you that your inner circle or those you trust have carries some weight when you are trying to define the real you. However, the trustworthiness index of the people you seek their opinion of you from must first be ascertained and should be very high. That said, care must be taken when internalizing external views because others judge what they don’t understand and society is configured to label non-conformists as flawed. In recent times Society’s moral standpoint has dipped below the abscissa having allowed its viewpoint to be influenced by negative actors. It is almost a case of the lawful being considered unlawful by an unlawful society.

Since we have gotten who you are not out of the way, lets proceed to unveil who you are in the part II of this post. If you have stayed with me thus far, I enjoin you to complete this journey of self discovery.

I’ll end by saying, life is beautiful and worth living. What a privilege to be alive! Let’s make the most of it!

Disclaimer: Content on this blog is for Christian inspiration and education only and reflects personal faith perspectives. It is not a substitute for medical, mental health, legal, or professional advice. Seeking qualified professional support is encouraged where needed. Use of this site is at your own discretion.[Read More]